"We are each not only one but also many." - Mary Midgley, Wickedness
Humans, we as an individual are so unique but at the same time so obvious. The uniqueness of us is our characteristics, our principles, and how we deal with something or someone, that in the same time is something obvious, that is because, religiously speaking, God has made us the same, yes, in psychology there are many theories of how people are, but that's the point isn't it? Just how many theories are there to identify how a person acts? Not so many.
Human behavior is 93 percent predictable, a group of leading Northeastern University network scientists recently found. Source
Going back to the title of this post, my life motto is "We are who we choose to be." It all started at senior high? My memories are a bit worn off, hehehe. It was my first year at senior high and there was this tradition for newies to go through what we call "MOS," it was of course to help the newies learn more about the school itself as a whole.
I remembered we had to write down our life motto on our name tag (which was big af). Back then I was searching for life quotes, I thought to myself that any quote will do as long as I liked it and that I wouldn't be punished for not finishing a simple task of making a name tag. I finally came across the quote that actually became my actual life motto. It was really surprising for me personally to be so strong about that quote until probably I die.
Now, I want to break down the reason why I really stick with that motto.
It is really true, we become who ever we want to. I always believed that hard work and practice will actually develop the skill, not that the skill is already there. But I must warn you, this motto is not always relevant to dreams (ex. becoming a doctor). But it is relevant to who we are as a person, where are we heading in life, the values, being good or bad.
But who are we?
We choose of course!!
The high school and college years are the most crucial time in life on finding who we are. Religiously speaking (again hahaha), we humans exist for one reason only, to worship God, this doesn't mean that we give our life to a life time of praying, no. But this means that we do everything in our life with the intention for worshiping God, its two things very different.
But then not everybody is on that level to understand that. So, let me break down the generally speaking of who we are in my opinion.
As I said at the beginning that humans as individuals (in groups thats a whole other problem that we aren't going to talk about in this post) are very unique. Their likes and dislikes, our values, how they face something, how they face themselves, etc. But here's the catch, everything we are now is the result of what kind of cultures are around us( The Determinate of Human Behavior.) The culture of our family, friends, work place, etc, are in fact different and become one within ourselves, but of course, WE CHOOSE what we want to internally put into ourselves.
But how do we choose? Well, this is very complex for me hahaha because this is turning into a philosophic way of seeing things and I don't really know if my opinion is that strong hahaha, but who cares lets read what I think.
To choose, we have to have a base, to know what we want in life and a religion. Why? Those two are the most basic things for a person to choose there values and morals that they want to put inside themselves. Religion is life, it practically is the basic of everything. For example, religion gives you knowledge on whats right and wrong in life because practically, morals that we have in our surroundings are from religions.
Now I know its very hard on knowing what you want, I have come to that situation a lot of times and I think that its okay. Trying different things and trying to see things differently are the key to know what you want in life. But if you find yourself already in that position then be blessed, because knowing what you want is a path of becoming who you are.
(OMG IMMA SO FCKIN DIZZY THINKING ABOUT ALL THESE THINGS CUZ LOGICALLY IT GOES ALL AROUND LIKE A CYCLE HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH)
Now being somebody that is liked by others is of course many people's desires. The first quote you see in this post, "We are each not only one but also many." Now, do you remember that a Japanese man once said that we have different personalities when we're alone, with our family and with our friends? Well, this is another quote about that. We are so many people, not that we are bipolar or something but because we have many masks. We cannot deny the fact that we have many masks, now that doesn't mean its always bad, in my opinion, it takes somebody with great emotional intelligence to read situations and put on the right mask on.
What I mean by this is not somebody fake or somebody hypocritical. But someone who has a good way of dealing with a situation or someone, someone who's EQ is very high. I come to realize that we as humans are dynamic, we cannot have just one personality because we always change and our surroundings always change, we have to have many personalities to fit every situation, when is the right time to be mad, when is the right time to be there for others, and when is the right time to be by ourselves.
Being emotionally intelligent takes time and the process of finding yourself, not only that, but finding the best way to treat yourself (not in a selfish and arrogant way) so that you could finally treat others well. As someone once told me, that we have to read the situations that are going on around us and the people too. Being emotionally intelligent is another way to help you know what you want and help you to become that.
So, where is this post heading to?
As a writer in Medium, Zat said, that we are the narrators that play in our own story that we alone wrote, thats what makes us narrators. We are who we choose to be, but remember this, as Zat also said that humans are unreliable narrators that can mistakenly think that they are painting their selves right but in reality its not corresponding with their surroundings.
To know who we are, we cannot deny who we are in our surroundings, get what I mean? For example, if you feel jealousy to your friend, don't deny it, because deep down you know its wrong, admit you're wrong and find a way not to feel like that find a way to deal with that without hurting anyone. That person who can face themselves like that is really great, emotionally intelligent. (Still practicing).
So, life isn't about who we are but its about becoming who we want to be.
Wassalam.
P.S. Sorry if its really simple and not really clear :"))))))
